Thanks for all of the great advice on my post: Is It Adoption Issues or Just a Normal Phase?

We incorporated the idea that Piney gets a certain spot in the fridge (one of the produce drawers) for her food. She can get her water cups, cut up fruit, cheese, etc. from her special drawer. We put her name on it with masking tape and made a big deal out of it.

She seems to really love it so far and has been staying out of the rest of the fridge since we implemented it.

It is actually nice for me because I can make all of her food at once. I only put non-messy finger foods in there (nothing crumbly or runny) so that she won't make a mess or need assistance.

She really likes the independence and we haven't had any problems since. However, we have yet to see if it is a long-term solution or just a fun novelty for her. Time will tell.

As for the other behavior/ discipline issues discussed....

I felt like a lot of the advice was along the lines with-

Discipline sometimes sharply when the situation calls for it, but then show an increase of love to make sure Piney understands that although we don't approve of the behavior we love her unconditionally.

The sharp discipline needs to be consistent and she also needs to feel consistent love and attention at all other times for it to be effective.

The question I am still mulling over is how sharp the discipline should be. Do some situations warrant spanking, while others a time out, and others a loss of privileges and others just a reminder- depending on the situation and her level of understanding and warnings?

I have read a lot of different theories about this.

We haven't used spankings in the past, but I wonder if certain situations call for a stricter response. If she knows the consequence, is given warnings and continues to misbehave.

Another idea is to not let her wear underwear if she pees or poops in her pants. She hates that and her brothers won't play with her if she isn't wearing underwear, so it is a big deterrent. I don't mean she has to wear a diaper. I mean she doesn't get to wear anything except a dress to cover herself like we used to do when she was two. However, this doesn't solve the problem of her pooping in her pants at school.

Perhaps a reward (candy?) for staying dry at school would be a good idea.

Anyway, I am still mulling it over and thinking about all of your great ideas. Any more thoughts would be appreciated.

Meanwhile, Piney wants to show you her pretty butterfly that is painted on her arm:
















"Oh... You can't see it very good? How's This? I LOVE Butterflies!"
















"Did I tell you how much fun I had plucking the little green tomatoes off of mommy's tomato plants? My mommy just smiled at me through her tears. She does that a lot. Oh I am A HAPPY girl!"

Labels: after adoption: transitioning successfully